Destiny Lost

Interlude to In the Space of a Journey

The Missing Day

Authors: carynsilver and Sonya

E-mail: carynsilver@yahoo.com or sonyajeb@swbell.net

Rating: PG

Category: B/X, O/Other, B/Other friendship, AU, relationship oriented

Chronology: This takes place during Chapter 22 of In the Space of a Journey.

Disclaimer: We do not own Buffy or any of the original characters or ideas from the show. They all belong to Joss, Mutant Enemy, etc. (But since they don't seem to want Doyle any more ::sob:: can we have him?) All we own is our own creative genius (unless that's too strong a word :) and any characters we make up, such as Sonya Parker and Aidan O'Shea.

Spoilers: Basic BtVS mythology and vampire/slayer lore. Not much for specific episodes of the show, but heavy spoilers for the earlier installments of this fanfic series! Especially ISOJ.

Author's Note: Did you wonder what B/X did when they went out on the town with Sonya and Oz at the end of ISOJ? Well, here it is, for your reading pleasure! :) This one-shot starts the night the four teens went out to dinner and then tells the story of the day that was overlooked for more plotty concerns in ISOJ. Reading all of Destiny Lost (ISOH, Halloween Incident, ISOD, and especially ISOJ) before reading this one-shot is recommended.

Xander Harris pushed back his plate. He'd eaten enough Shepherd's Pie to stuff the shepherd and his whole flock of sheep, but he felt good. He sat at a table for four in a small restaurant in England with two of his best friends, Sonya Parker and Daniel "Oz" Osbourn, and his girlfriend, who doubled as the Chosen One, Buffy Summers.

"That was some good eatin'!" Xander drawled happily.

"Pig," Buffy teased.

"After what I've been through, I deserve to be a pig," Xander protested. "Kidnapped, starved, head of a rescue mission..."

"Hey!" both Sonya and Oz cried.

"I thought I led the rescue mission," Oz said. "I was the one with super powers."

"I think my starvation and kidnapping lasted a lot longer than yours, Harris!" Sonya told Xander with flashing blue eyes.

Xander grinned at Sonya. It was great being back on friendly terms with her. Sometimes it took life and death situations to make a guy see the truth.

"If you say so," he acquiesced grandly.

Then he turned and smiled at Buffy. She smiled back. He admired the way the curve of her lips put a brilliant sparkle in her gorgeous eyes. More than anything else, Xander was just happy to be with Buffy again. This was supposed to be their Spring Break vacation with a little business with the Council on the side, not what it had turned into -- a huge mess where he was separated from his friends and Buffy for days upon days. The only upside to the whole thing was that he and Buffy finally seemed to be off on the right foot again, relationship-wise. It was a good thing. He tried never to think about that time so recently when she hated him. There was no good there. And now things were fine, so he didn't have to worry about it, right?

Xander slid his arm around Buffy's shoulders. His fingers caressed the bare shoulder revealed by her aqua tank top. He felt her shiver slightly in response. That made him smile, and drove away any lingering unpleasant thoughts.

"So," Sonya said, "this has been fun, but I think it's too late, or to dark, for any real sight-seeing tonight."

"Yeah," Buffy agreed, "you're probably right. And it's not like Big Ben is Glow-In-The-Dark."

"I know!" Xander said. "Why don't we go tomorrow, just the four of us? We never do stuff together like that. It will be fun. We can see all the sights England has to offer. We've got at least a day to kill before the Council is ready to meet with us again anyway."

"Cool," Oz agreed. Buffy and Sonya nodded.

"All right, then," Xander said, rubbing his hands together in anticipation. "We'd better get back to the hotel."

"It's only nine thirty," Sonya protested.

"I'm getting you guys up at the crack of dawn tomorrow," Xander promised. "We don't want to waste a second of our day together."

"You getting up out of bed before noon?" Sonya laughed. "I'll believe that when I see it!"

Oz knocked on the door to the girl's suite, hoping to find the others inside. He had been the last for a turn in the shower, so he was late.

The door opened to reveal Cordelia Chase standing there. She looked a little the worse for wear. Oz noted purple smudges under her eyes, and her eyes looked a little swollen. He wondered what was wrong, but he didn't know if she'd want to tell him.

"If you're looking for Buffy and Sonya, they went down with Xander for breakfast in the hotel restaurant fifteen minutes ago," Cordelia said quietly. "They said they'd meet you down there."

Oz nodded. "Thanks."

She started to shut the door, but he stopped her. "Hey... we're going sight-seeing today. Wanna come with?" He knew that the others wouldn't want him to invite the socialite queen along on their adventure for four, but he couldn't help it. She looked like she needed a friend. If she stayed here she'd have to hang out with Rupert Giles and Joyce Summers -- the two adults of the group who were worn out from the events of the week and had decided to stay in.

Cordelia shook her head. "No thanks. I'm sure you don't really want me to come."

"If I didn't want you to, I wouldn't ask," Oz assured her, carefully not mentioning anyone else.

She flashed him a smile, but it was several watts short of her normal brilliance. "That's sweet, Oz, but I couldn't anyway. I'm trying to get in touch with my father to tell him that I want to fly home with you all instead of waiting until he's done with his business trip. I paged him. He's supposed to call back sometime between now and Thursday."

Oz could hear the bitterness behind her attempt at a joke loud and clear. It was blindingly apparent that Queen C did not have the perfect life she liked to pretend she did. But Oz didn't know what else he could do or say to make her feel better.

"Well," he finally said, "if you decide you want to come, feel free. We'll be downstairs for a while."

She nodded. "Thanks." Then she gently closed the door, leaving Oz to go downstairs. What he didn't know was that after she shut him out, Cordelia crawled back into bed and pulled the covers over her head.

"I know I'm supposed to be all impressed, and it is really pretty, but I have to be the one to point this out -- it's a big clock." Sonya shrugged her shoulders, looking back at the others. "It's like a monument to punctuality or something."

Buffy rolled her eyes. "That's so not the point here, Sonya. I mean, just look at it! It's beautiful!" She looked over at Xander for confirmation, but he had his head buried in the map with Oz. They were planning out the rest of the day and composing a check list of all the things they wanted to see before they had to head back to the hotel.

"Okay, what have we got so far?" Xander asked, still staring at the map.

Oz looked down at the piece of paper in his hands and read off all the names. "Big Ben, Buckingham Palace and the Changing of the Guard, which is at 11:30, by the way."

Xander looked at his watch, which read 10:00. "Since we got started late, we'll have to hurry to make it in time, but I'm sure we can manage."

Oz nodded and continued, "The Tower of London, Piccadilly Circus, St Paul's Cathedral, Westminster Abbey, the Houses of Parliament, Hyde Park and we want to try and go to the Greenwich Meridian..."

"More with the time thing!" Sonya interjected, smiling good-naturedly at Oz.

Oz smiled back and then concluded, "And we want to see the River Thames, which we can see while we're at Tower Bridge."

Xander took the list from Oz and looked it over, deep in thought. "Okay, we can check Big Ben off the list..."

Buffy dutifully handed him a pen which he used to scratch a line through the first item on the list. "And the Houses of Parliament, too..."

Oz gestured at the buildings of which they were speaking. "Yeah, 'cause check 'em out."

"That only leaves eight things for us to see today."

Sonya and Buffy nodded in agreement.

Xander turned to Oz and the two boys began planning their itinerary, deciding how much time to allot for each attraction, including travel time by foot, bus or subway.

The girls watched all this with bemused expressions on their faces. Sonya looked over at Buffy and sighed melodramatically. "Boys."

Buffy giggled. "Yep, can't live with 'em, can't kill 'em off without going to prison!"

Sonya laughed. "I couldn't have said it better myself."

After a few more minutes of frenzied planning, Xander announced that they were ready to go.

"Where to first, oh Tour Guide of my heart?" Buffy drawled, batting her eyelashes at Xander.

He looked down at his list, to absorbed in his plans to notice her flirting. "Westminster Abbey is closest. Then we'll head over to Buckingham Palace and stake out a spot to watch the changing of the guard."

Buffy sighed, giving Xander a mock salute. "Yes, sir!"

"I hope they do this quickly," Xander muttered as they waited for the famous changing of the guard. "If not, we won't have a chance to get everything in."

"Shhh," Buffy hissed as the red-coated, black-hatted guards started their daily march.

"Yeah, Harris," Sonya said firmly, "enjoy what we're doing now instead of worrying about what we're doing next."

"I just want to get everything in," Xander replied with a pout. "It's not like I'm ever going to be in London again. I'd hate to miss something."

Buffy stretched up on her toes and planted a kiss on her boyfriend's cheek. "I love you, Xander."

"I love you, too," Xander answered in some surprise.

Buffy smiled, then turned to watch the guards. Some of them were riding on horses now. "OK, then, shut up, all right?"

That made him chuckle. Folding the map up again, he circled Buffy's waist with his arms from behind and rested his chin on her shoulder. "Your wish is my command.”

After the guards had done their thing, Xander pulled Oz aside as they began to plot their next move. Sonya and Buffy wondered off a little way to look at a small field filled with geese, though they mostly wanted to escape the boys and their planning.

"This is so great," Buffy said, eyeing the large gray and black birds with pleasure as she tossed a few bread crumbs to them. "Everything here is so beautiful... the landscape, the buildings, the geese, the shop windows... It's even neat to look at those big two-story bus thingies!"

Sonya nodded. "Yeah, it is pretty cool to be above ground in London."

Buffy slanted a gaze in the other girl's direction as both of their minds immediately flashed to the bowels of the Watchers' Compounds. "Sonya... are you all right?"

The brunette's smile vanished and her brow puckered. "Fine."

"How come I don't believe you?" Buffy asked.

"I don't know," Sonya responded in a dull voice. "Because I just spent several days being tortured at the hands of the organization that I used to work for and trust?" She sighed deeply and ran her fingers through her brown hair. "Sorry, Buffy. I know that things will be better once the purge is finished."

"Yeah, now that Chamberlain's gone, the Council will get back to what it's supposed to be," Buffy said quietly. "I have to believe that, because if I don't then after everything they did I could never work for them again. Or even let them live."

Sonya tried a smile, but it didn't come off very well. "I'm sure that Gwendolyn chick will kick all the bad guys' asses. She seems to have her head on straight."

Buffy examined Sonya closely. She looked like a perfectly normal seventeen year old. She had plenty of natural color in her cheeks, her hair was bouncy and if her blue eyes weren't bright, they were at least... normal. There was nothing to indicate that she'd spent the last few days in a basement tomb being ruthlessly tortured.

"Your healing factor is still working, right?" the Slayer asked. She tried to quell the worried tone in her voice. Sonya wasn't the type to take concern well.

"Pretty much," Sonya answered evasively. Buffy stared at her until she continued, "They stretched it to its limits, but I'm mostly better now. Recharged or something."

Buffy nodded. "You know... I... I'm glad you're OK, Sonya. I kinda missed you while you were gone."

"Really?" Sonya couldn't keep a mild level of shock out of her voice. Rivals in the past for everything from the Slayer powers to Watchers to boyfriends, Sonya and Buffy hadn't ever been best buds. They'd come to understand each other more when Jenny Calendar forced them to endure a telepathic link for a few hours. But, while their loathing for each other had vanished, they weren't best chums by any stretch of the imagination.

"Really." Buffy nodded decisively. "And... I know that I've been treating you badly lately, ever since the whole Xander thing..."

"You had every right!" Sonya exclaimed. "I never should have done what I did with him, no matter what my feelings were."

"But who could blame you for going after what you really wanted?"

"What I thought I wanted..." Sonya looked down at her feet, fixating on her navy blue and white walking shoes.

"What you thought...?"

"Yeah," Sonya agreed. "Nathan was right about one thing... my feelings for Xander were, well, juvenile."

"Are you saying there's someone else?" Buffy asked.

"Too soon to tell," Sonya answered vaguely.

Buffy suspected it was Oz -- it was written all over both of their faces when they were in the same room together -- but if Sonya wasn't ready to share that with her, then it was all right. She gave Sonya a genuine smile, and then surprised the other girl by giving her a hug. Sonya stood there stiffly for a moment, and then returned the hug.

A few moments later, Buffy glanced over at Xander and Oz. "We'd better go rescue Oz and get on with this sight-seeing thing."

"Yeah," Sonya agreed.

The two girls walked over, and Buffy plucked the map out of Xander's hands.

"Hey!" Xander cried, pretending to be outraged.

"Hey!" Buffy parroted back. Then she began walking down the road at a quick clip, forcing the others to follow her.

"What are you doing?" Xander asked as he caught up with her.

"I'm taking over this show, Mr. Tour Guide," Buffy said with a sweet smile. "You had your chance. Now it's my turn."

Xander looked worried. "We're not going to miss the Tower of London, are we?"

"Trust me, Xander," Buffy said, a mysterious smile on her lips. "We won't miss anything."

"Well," Xander said, clasping her hand, "if you put it that way..."

The four teenagers ended their whirlwind tour of London in Piccadilly Circus. They started by the statue of Eros in the center of the traffic circle (or roundabout, as the locals called it) and began checking out all the shops and passers by.

"Wow!" Buffy cried, taking in the crowds of people and the colorful electric signs with wide eyes. "I've never seen anything like this!"

"Definitely beats the Sunnydale Flea Market," Oz deadpanned.

Xander rolled his eyes. "Don't even try, man!"

"Hey!" Sonya protested, clipping Xander on the back of the head. "Take that back, Harris! Oz's jokes are great!"

"Never!" Xander cried. He and Sonya began a mock fight around the statue. Several bystanders stopped and looked at them, but, luckily, most of them were just amused, not annoyed, by the youthful display of enthusiasm.

Buffy glanced at Oz. "Should we break this up before it gets ugly?"

"Might be too late," Oz replied, watching as Xander stole a tiny, plastic copy of Big Ben, Sonya's souvenir of choice, out of her pocket. She retaliated by beating him over the head with a camera case. Fortunately, the camera was safe in Buffy's hands from when she had snapped a few pictures in Hyde Park earlier that afternoon.

A mischievous grin came over the Slayer's face. She raised the camera and snapped a few candids of what was rapidly becoming a street brawl. Then she and Oz went over and grabbed Xander and Sonya, respectively, by the arms and pulled them apart.

"Come on, Jean Claude," Buffy told Xander with a teasing smile. "You're coming with me." They started walking and then Buffy spied flower vendor with a plethora of fragrant, colorful flowers. "Oh, let's go see."

Oz looked at Sonya. "Should we make a break for it?"

"Away from the Tour Guide Duo of Death?" Sonya replied sarcastically. "Definitely."

They ducked behind another group of tourists and cut a path through the crowd, away from Buffy and Xander. A little while later, they came upon a small square full of pigeons.

"Oh, look!" Sonya exclaimed. A little boy threw down a crust of bread and at least fifty of the plump birds swarmed around him. "I wish I hadn't eaten all of my scone this morning."

Oz pulled some leftovers from breakfast out of his pocket. "Here."

"Weren't you saving that for a snack?"

He shook his head and put the bits of bread and pastry in her hand. "Nah. The birds deserve it."

Sonya smiled at him and then made her way into the middle of the square. The pigeons cooed and fluttered around her, as if in anticipation of would-be treats. She figured they must beg for a living, they were so good at it, and some of them were so fat. She dropped the first piece and the birds swarmed. She laughed in delight at the sight and hurried to do it again. Oz watched, a real smile warming his normally impassive face.

"Buy some flowers for the pretty lady?" the flower vendor asked Xander with a toothy grin.

"How much?" Xander asked, pulling out his wallet. He had enough, and soon Buffy had a small nosegay of roses and carnations to call her own.

She took it from him with a sweet smile. "Thank you." Buffy pressed the flowers to her nose and inhaled. "Oh... beautiful."

"You're worth it," Xander told her. He could feel his love for her overwhelming him as he watched.

"Xander," she said, interrupting his reverie. "I think we need to talk."

"Uh, oh." In Xander's experience, conversations with women that began "we need to talk" were never good. "What's wrong?"

Buffy took his hand, cradling her flowers in her other hand, and pulled him over to an out of the way bench. They sat down and turned so they faced each other. Their knees brushed lightly.

"What do we need to talk about?" Xander tried again.

"I thought..." She paused, and then blurted. "I think we need to talk about our relationship."

His eyes opened wider. "What? I thought we settled all that on the plane. What's going on? Please don't tell me, after all this, that we're breaking up again..."

"No!" Buffy cried. "Nothing like that. It's just... things happened so fast. I just thought maybe we should clarify things. Just so we both know where we stand."

Xander's heart slowed down a little and he really focused on what Buffy was saying. Maybe she was right. The only thing he knew to do was bare his heart to her.

"I love you, Buffy. I've loved you from the first moment I saw you. I love your golden hair, your eyes, your smile. But even more, I love your heart and your beautiful soul." He paused, trying to find the words to convey the things he felt inside. He had never done something like this before. It was hard, and scary, too, but it also felt exhilarating. His heart pounded in his chest. He could hear it, and his own voice, echoing in his ears.

"I want to be with you, Buffy. That's it. End of story. I never want to start a day knowing that one of us is with somebody else. You're... you're my soul mate."

Tears glistened in Buffy's eyes. "Me, too, Xander. To everything you said. I... I was scared, I guess. Scared of being hurt. Scared of how I felt about you... But I do love you, with a love that's so different from everything I've ever felt before. I can be myself with you, no matter what. I'm happy just to be with you, even if we're doing something stupid, like laundry."

She stopped for a second and took a really deep breath. "There's something else."

"Something more than that?" Xander questioned, an incredulous smile on his face.

"Yeah." Buffy clasped his hand tightly, enjoying the feel of his strong fingers between hers. "I need to say I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"For how I treated you after the whole Nathan/Sonya thing. It was wrong. I was being selfish and wallowing in my own pain. I should never have strung you along like that. I know it doesn't make any difference, but I guess I was just afraid that you didn't feel about me like I felt about you. I thought maybe underneath you might really want Sonya, or someone else, and I might get hurt again."

The tears spilled over her lashes. "But I know I was wrong. And I'm sorry. So sorry. I love you, Xander Harris. And I trust you. Completely."

It was if a weight she had been carrying around for months had dropped free. She looked up, and in his brown eyes she found the love and acceptance she craved. And she knew that he found the exact same thing in her eyes.

"Thank you, Buffy, for telling me that."

They sat there for a minute, just being with each other and reflecting on what had just been said. Then Buffy flung herself into his arms, heedless of anything but the need to feel him wrapped around her. He caught her easily, and squeezed her back just as tight.

After a few long minutes, Buffy pulled back. He was smiling down on her, happier than she'd seen him in a long time. She smiled right back. Then she clasped her hands around the back of his neck and pulled him down so she could kiss him.

Xander kissed her back with everything he had inside. All the fears he'd been pushing away since they'd arrived in England and found nothing but trouble and anguish were gone. It was a wonderful feeling.

When they finally broke apart, Xander looked down and started to laugh.

"What?" Buffy asked.

He gestured. She followed his pointing finger and gasped. "My flowers!"

The once-lovely nosegay had been crushed in their frantic embrace, and now they both had a good coating of rose petals on their clothes. They stood up and started shaking the plant matter off onto the ground.

"Well, at least you got to enjoy them for a little while," Xander said.

"It's all right," Buffy replied. "I'd rather have you than a bunch of flowers any day."

"Now if that's not a compliment, then I don't know what is!" Xander slid his arm around her shoulder, and she slipped hers around his waist, hooking a finger in one of his belt loops.

They started walking, and then Buffy stopped, looking around in confusion.

"What's wrong?" Xander asked.

Buffy glanced up at him with wide eyes. "I just realized... we lost Sonya and Oz!"

Glancing around, Xander realized she was right. He worried for a second, and then shrugged. "You know what? Wherever they are, I'm sure they're having just as much fun as we are."

Buffy smiled. "Nah. That's impossible." Then she stopped right there, in the middle of the sidewalk with people milling around on both sides, to give him another long, passionate kiss. And he did not resist.

The End